Sunday, September 20, 2009

30 Things

This is a list of questions/fill in the blank that was put out by Invisible Illness Week.

1. The illness I live with is: migraines and depression
2. I was diagnosed with it in the year: I wasn't diagnosed with migraines until 21 and depression until I was 25.
3. But I had symptoms since: depression since I was a little little girl and migraines since I was 12
4. The biggest adjustment I’ve had to make is: That some days I can't do it all
5. Most people assume: That I really don't look sick but that I say I am sick quite a lot.
6. The hardest part about mornings are: usually my migraines are the worse early morning or late night. So early mornings can be hard when I have a migraine.
7. My favorite medical TV show is: none - I don't watch any because I have sympathy pains.
8. A gadget I couldn’t live without is: microwave - when I have a migraine - I need to be able to cook fast and easy and my indoor grill and the microwave are my best friends for cooking.
9. The hardest part about nights are: When I have a migraine, the pain is so bad I can't sleep. Also I get insomnia with my depression so I have that often so lack of sleep is a hard part of the night.
10. Each day I take __ pills & vitamins. When I have a migraine several Excedrin migraine and one multi-vitamins. Plus then I have 2 other pills I take everyday one for my depression and the other for high blood pressure.
11. Regarding alternative treatments I: tried many
12. If I had to choose between an invisible illness or visible I would choose: neither but I would like one that is taken seriously or had a clear treatment - if I had to have one.
13. Regarding working and career: I often can't hold a regular 40 hour a week job because I have migraines so often.
14. People would be surprised to know: that - the above answer about not being able to not often doing 40 hours a week.
15. The hardest thing to accept about my reality has been: just gauging how much I can do each day
16. Something I never thought I could do with my illness that I did was: find a treatment that works for depression now I just need to find something that works for my migraines.
17. The commercials about my illness: are what they are. I mean they really don't do a lot for me - except at times give me names of a new med to try for my migraines.
18. Something I really miss doing since I was diagnosed is: nothing really because I had symptoms long before diagnosed so had to often live gauging things step by step of my day and wondering if I could do the next thing. And I do that now.
19. It was really hard to have to give up: I haven't had to really give up anything - I am not often triggered by foods only if I already have one started then sometimes some foods will make it worse but it isn't a hardship to give it up for those moments. And then some days I can't do everything I want to do so if I wanted to go for a walk or a day trip - I have to say no at times because light will hurt and the movement from walking will increase my heart rate which will spike my migraine more. So again it is all about gauging what I can and can't do for the day or the moment.
20. A new hobby I have taken up since my diagnosis is: nothing new
21. If I could have one day of feeling normal again I would: I try to just pack more into my day then often gets accomplished now.
22. My illness has taught me: to be more understanding towards those with my illness so that when they have to cancel I understand.
23. Want to know a secret? One thing people say that gets under my skin is: When they have to tell me to see a doctor or try a med because really do they think I haven't? It doesn't make sense to me. I have lived with migraines since I was 12 so you don't think I have tried many many drugs and seen many doctors over the years. Of course I have so why do you need to tell me to do something I have obviously done. Or that people think both depression and migraines are just in my head.
24. But I love it when people: just accept that I am who I am and I can't at times do everything
25. My favorite motto, scripture, quote that gets me through tough times is: I cannot change yesterday. I can only make the most of today, and look with hope toward tomorrow.
26. When someone is diagnosed I’d like to tell them: to not beat up on themselves for not being able to do it all and to not get frustrated when one med doesn't work. Keep trying.
27. Something that has surprised me about living with an illness is: The not being able to function normally everyday.
28. The nicest thing someone did for me when I wasn’t feeling well was: make me dinner, give me an ice pack and tuck me in. Thank goodness for Michael.
29. I’m involved with Invisible Illness Week because: I think often these things aren't talked about. We pretend that migraines aren't really an illness. "It is just a headache." And that depression is just being down or being blue instead of a chemical imbalance that makes the blues seems like a walk on a nice spring day. It needs to be talked about and shown that these are illnesses that cause real problems everyday for many people.
30. The fact that you read this list makes me feel: makes me sad that anyone has to have an illness - invisible or visible.

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