100 Things | Singing

11. I like to sing.

I have always liked to sing. As a little girl, I remember my Mom singing a lot so I am sure that had some influence over me as I loved hearing her sing. My Mom played the piano - so often my sisters and I would sing with her as she played. We had quite a few sing-along type book. Quite a lot of hits of the 70's - like the Carpenters or Debbie Boone's You Light Up My Life. I remember sitting in the living room and flipping through the song books just to find a song to sing. No accompaniment just to sing acapella because I enjoyed singing.

My Grandparents had a pretty little garden in their back yard and we often used it as a staging area to put on "shows" for them....my sisters and cousins. Our Grandma often sang to us and taught us songs so often we used those songs in our "shows." When I was a very little girl, I was in singing contests -- I have a really clear memory of one in Bottineau, North Dakota(one of my favorite places we lived when I was growing up).

We moved when I was starting 5th grade to Omaha and I became shy. But I still was in the youth church choir. I did solos and duets. But then one time I was picked for a solo. I am up there ready to sing my solo. I was looking out at that crowd in the church and I felt this fear grow inside me. I was shaking and my palms were sweaty. I sang a few words and then stopped. Stopped...Stopping singing right there in the middle of my solo. I just stood there petrified. I developed stage fright over night it seemed. After that I stayed in a choir for a while but didn't do another solo. I couldn't get past the fear that I might do that again. I really didn't sing publicly that much longer. I still enjoyed singing just was too scared to sing publicly. I let that fear hold me back. When I didn't keep up with the singing of course the control and breathing started to slip. But I still enjoyed it even if I was more out of tune. Usually just singing by msyelf or to the radio.

I had a roommate when I lived in Cleveland that had a really good voice. She played the guitar and sang. One night she was playing in the dining room after dinner. I was cleaning up the dishes humming and singing along. She finally stopped and told me that I needed to sing louder. We were harmonizing really well together. It was a Stevie Nicks song and we just had lots of fun singing together. I think she reminded me how much I liked to sing.

Now Michael always says he knows I am feeling good when I sing. Michael and I like to sing on road trips too. Michael has a very good voice and we just have fun singing together. We sing to musicals -- RENT and Across the Universe are our current favorites to sing to.

I know my voice isn't as good as it was when I was younger. I just don't have the control over it like I once did but it doesn't stop me from singing and it won't. It makes cleaning, doing things around the house and road trips go faster and better. And it does make me feel good to sing.

(photo of one of our "shows" at my Grandparents -- I am in the yellow dress -- left to right -- my little sister April, my cousin Nikki, me and then my sister Michelle)